Hi everyone....I wanted to give you details of the journey Savannah and our family has had the past five years.
THE ACCIDENT
It was a clear January day. The news had been talking about a blizzard type storm coming in sometime that morning. However, when I headed out to work that morning the skies were clear and the roads were dry. It was cold. I dropped my children off at their schools and went on my way. Rush hour traffic is always a bear to tackle every morning. I was always trying to find a route that was quicker and easier. I thought I found it.....but this ended up being the route that would change me and my family’s life forever.
I was driving the speed limit and following the flow of traffic on a two lane state road. I was headed for the exit that would take me closer to my workplace. I came upon a slight curve in the road and a guard rail that out lined the curve. I never quite understood why that guardrail was there. It seemed to be more of a hazard than anything. Both ends of the guard rail “ramped” down to the pavement rather than a straight edge and they were never marked well. Plus each end of the guardrail seemed to be flattened from cars running into them on many different occasions. Out of nowhere I heard some clanging, crashing type of noises, but could not see in front of the car ahead of me to see what was going on, because of the curve. It all happened so fast, but at the same time seemed to last forever.
Out of the blue I see a car actually flying through the air. The initial thought was “Wow, it’s like something you see in the movies”, not realizing what would happen next. I thought the car was going to fly right by me. Instead, it flew into my driver’s side door. It was like a slow motion feeling. Quickly, the surroundings came back to real time. I immediately took off my seat belt to get out and make sure everyone was alright. Then it hit me…I wasn’t going anywhere. The dash was in my lap and what was left of the driver's side door was laying on top of me. I was trapped. Soon thereafter a woman came to my window frantically telling me “hang in there, someone is on their way”. I couldn’t quite understand why she was so panicky. Quickly, I realized why. I couldn’t feel my left arm or move it. It felt very heavy. I couldn’t feel my legs. My entire body was numb as I was going into shock. The main worry was difficulty breathing as if I was gasping for air. I will never forget the distinct smells while I was gasping for my next breath. I immediately turned to her and said “Please tell them I am pregnant and please tell them to hurry" as I could feel myself fading. I felt as though I was going to black out. I kept telling myself to calm down and concentrate on breathing. All of a sudden everything went black. I could still hear what was going on around me. My experience from nursing kicked in reminding myself that hearing is the last thing to go. I was still alive and I need to fight. I started to think of the last thing I said to each of my children and saw pictures of them in my mind. How I had to stay in this world for them. I thought of my unborn child and wanted to live to see her face and meet her in person. I HAD to make it through this for my children.
The next thing I heard was the sound of a man’s voice asking me for phone numbers. I for the life of me could not think of any numbers. I couldn't think straight like my mind was drifting in and out on a cloud. Then I heard him say “life-line”. I knew then how serious this was. I heard glass breaking while they were trying to extract me from the car, still unable to see and very confused about what was going on around me. "Keep breathing, keep breathing" I kept telling myself. After that, I do not remember a thing. I lost consciousness. Was I dead? I woke up in the Emergency Room at a level one trauma hospital while the nurse was trying to put a chest tube in to re-inflate my lung that had collapsed. She could not get between the five broken ribs that had collapsed with the lung. Once the chest tube was in I began to breathe a little easier but began to feel intense pain in my leg. What was wrong with it? Apparently the bones had broken and were protruding through the skin and muscle. I heard mention of possible amputation. I think I remember saying “I don’t care, just please stop the pain”. I’m not sure what happened after that until I woke up in the Intensive Care Unit feeling very nauseated. I was hooked up to several machines not sure what had just happened and still very fuzzy headed. Unsure of what "parts" I still had or what needed to be done during surgery. I just remember thinking "I'm alive" But what about the baby?
It was shortly after when I discovered the extent of my injuries. I had open fracture of my leg, five broken ribs, lacerated spleen, internal bleeding, hemo-pneumothroax (punctured lung with blood filling the cavity), shattered fracture in my upper arm, fractured scapula, and a concussion. The surgery involved a lot of metal, rods, plates, pins, screws, you name it I had it in the left side of my body. I became half a bionic woman. I also received five blood transfusions due to the internal bleeding. I had several CT scans, MRI's, Xrays, etc. But the most important of all was the status of my unborn child. Was she still with us? I was told that they monitored the baby’s heart beat once I was in the Emergency Room and it was determined that I was somewhat stable. They found a heartbeat...hallelujah!!!! She was still with me!! Not thinking of the complications that she could have experienced as a result of the accident, surgeries, medications,etc. I felt so blessed knowing she was still alive. "She must be a fighter like her mommy" was my first thought.
I was on a morphine drip for pain. I was moved to Progressive Care in two days then to a regular room after that with the chest tube in place the entire time. I can’t describe the pain or horror I felt during my stay. I remember a doctor telling me that if I were to get in an accident I picked a good time to do it, because all of the baby's vital organs had developed and she wasn't big enough to get the impact of the crash......(he failed to mention she could potentially have brain damage). So I held onto this little bit of hope. I was told That my insurance had run out and no further days would be covered in the hospital. I had three children at home to care for and stairs to climb when I got there. I was in no condition to take that on. I couldn’t walk even with a walker let alone climb stairs so I was transferred to a Rehabilitation Hospital so I could learn how to walk again and to climb stairs. After a week it was time to go home.
The next couple of weeks were horrific. Being a nurse, I was always the caregiver not the receiver so it was very difficult to be helpless. I know I was not a good patient. I was frustrated with the fact that I couldn't take care of myself. After all, I had three children I needed to care for but I could barely care for myself. I wanted to get back to being a mommy. I didn't have time for this. I had a shower chair with rollers on it to maneuver from the bed to the bathroom using my one good leg to "scootch". The entire task took quite a bit of time to accomplish. At times I wouldn't make it. I was embarrassed and humiliated. I was isolated to the second level of the home for a while because I wasn't confident in my ability to climb stairs. I had to fold my walker and use it as a crutch as I traveled up and down. Each time I laid down or tried to get up from lying down I would experience an almost complete "blackout" followed by the room spinning. My children were wonderful and wanted to help but I was the one that wanted to take care of them. I wanted them to continue on with their lives. I wanted them to keep being kids because they would never get that time back. I didn't want them feeling like they needed to care for me. After all, that isn't supposed to happen until I am elderly right? I went to my children's sporting events after building my confidence with the stairs but had to attend in a wheelchair due to the amount of walking it took to get in and out of the buildings. I had to be driven by others anywhere I wanted to go. I didn't want to go many places but my kids events have always been important to me. My parents were my saving grace those first couple of weeks.
I went back to work on my walker approximately four weeks after the accident. I was highly advised by my nurse case manager to reconsider returning to work based on my injuries. But, I had planned on taking the full time off for my new baby after delivery. The time I had already taken for the accident had cut into my plan. I did have an extensive ultrasound after I got home from the hospital. The results did not reveal any significant findings which gave me further hope. However, being a nurse, especially a Labor and Delivery OB/GYN nurse, I was still a little worried. After all, physicians advise not to even take an advil during pregnancy much less what we just went through. I had also enrolled into college prior to the accident so I could further my degree in nursing. The classes began about six weeks after the accident. Once again, I attended in my walker. Clasess were held once a week for three hours a night. I attended after work one day a week.
Some time during my recovery I also learned that I was taken to the hospital by ambulance instead of life line due to incoming weather conditions. Life line helicopter was called to come to the scene of the accident to fly me in to the hospital due to the extent of my injuries and most likely because I was also pregnant. However, I also learned that the helicopter took flight to come to the scene and had to return to their take off point due to bad visibility. Apparently the storm the news had been talking about had reached downtown Indianapolis. We were northeast of there and the storm has not approached our area at that time. I wonder to this day if there would have been a different outcome for Savannah had they flown me to the hospital. Life line typically has a very skilled experienced staff on board more familiar with serious injuries. I wonder if getting to the hospital quicker and placing the chest tube would have allowed less time for decreased oxygen to my baby girl. I guess I will never know.
In the midst of all this I had to find out how to pay the bills, what I needed to do to get my medical bills covered by the guy that hit me. The immediate need was to get a car to replace the one that was totaled during the accident. I had just purchased a SUV four months before the accident. I was in love with this vehicle. It was the first automobile that was nice and big enough for the family including the new addition on the way. However, since it was a new purchase, the insurance did not value the car at what I had left to pay on it. Therefore I had to roll the difference into another car. Not to mention the fact that I had not been working so was receiving no compensation and my credit was going downhill during the time it took to find a lawyer that wouldn't screw me over. This was a cut and dry case. Black and White. No question who was at fault and no question that the policy limits would be met if not exceeded from this accident. I wanted a lawyer that was willing to take less than a third for writing a letter to the company of the other driver's insurance and cashing in for very little effort. I found one and it was exactly the case. Once the settlement was done I was able to pay off the car I had purchased with the additional funds that I had to roll over into the new loan. I paid approximately sixteen thousand dollars for a nine thousand dollar vehicle. By the time the medical expenses were covered and the lawyer took his cut, there was little to none left. But this didn't bother me. All I wanted was the results of this accident covered. After all, had this not happened I would have continued to coast through life as I had been. Always striving to reach the American dream. Furthering my degree to open doors for my career so I could take care of my children and give them the best lifestyle I could offer.
But this dream turned into a nightmare...
I carried the pregnancy to term while working full time and attending school. The delivery went without much incident. She was in the newborn nursery and had APGAR scores of 6 and 9. The doctor did a newborn assessment on her and found everything to check out fine. Being a nurse and working in Labor and Delivery and Newborn Nursery, AND knowing what she had been through with the accident, I was leary. I asked the doctor several questions about my concerns. She had slightly overlapping suture lines and a small fontannel. But he told me not to worry. In hindsight I also remember the nurses in the nursery concerned with her being "jittery" so they drew blood sugars and, of course, they were fine.
I also remember getting her newborn pictures in the hospital and the photographer having difficulty positioning her due to "stiffness". These were all signs that no one picked up on...and of course I overlooked because I wanted to hang on to the "hope" the medical professionals were giving me. I took her home and began to notice she was very irritable. I thought she might have colic.....but , again, in hindsight I figured out that was not the case. I also noticed a poor suck reflex, which I expressed to the doctor during her newborn visits and I was told not to worry. Another symptom was constipation. Her bowel movements were hard and sometime the size of softballs (how miserable that must have been for her).
Once she started into the developmental milestones at around 4 months of age, I noticed she wasn't holding her head up very well. I also mentioned this to the doctor. his response was "just give her a couple of months, some kids are just a little delayed". That was it for me...I just had a bad feeling that something was really wrong. I made an appointment with First Steps to have her evaluated . I also made an appointment with a developmental pediatrician to get a baseline assessment. First Steps came in, did an evaluation, and determined that Savannah qualified for services. All the while I was doing research on what could possibly be wrong. I was never a pediatric nurse so I was not familiar with pediatric conditions. Nor did I realize that there was a brain condition out there that didn't eventually lead to an early death. I thought all disabilities were degenerative and typically none of them had a long lifespan. During the research phase I realized how wrong I was. There was no evidence of ANY genetic or hereditary problems on either side of my or her father's families....which is what I was running into during my search. The ONLY thing I could come up with was cerebral palsy. I asked the First Steps evaluators if this is what they thought was going on with my child...I asked them to please help me try to understand what was going on with my daughter. Their response was "we can not diagnose children".. I told them I understood, but this was totally off the record. I needed to understand what was going on so I could help my daughter. They would not budge.
Then came the appointment with the pediatric developmental doctor, which I could not get for two months from the time of the call. I will NEVER forget this day. I took her in and the doctor did an assessment and told me "I am glad you picked up on this, I share your concerns for your daughter. We need to get an MRI". Once they received the films, a neurologist came to the office to read them. The setting of this meeting will forever be ingrained in my mind . The films were on the "light board" both doctors were standing on each side of them. We were taken into a room where it looked like staff members were taking a break around a table. The neurologist then told us the news...."this area right here is abnormal" After the initial shock we reconvened in the exam room and the questions began.....how bad was it...how will this affect her life? What will she be able or not able to do? It was like pulling teeth to get information. I couldn't believe that they couldn't be more forthcoming with information about what was going on with my daughter.....
Then the REAL journey started...now I had to set up appointments with SEVERAL different types of services....arm braces, foot braces, new doctors, medications, injections, a physiatrist, a neurologist, an orthopedist , cardiologist, opthamologist, gastroenterologist etc etc etc....I was lost. I was caught in a whirl wind. As a nurse I had always worked around doctors and all of them said the same thing..."there is no doubt in my mind that the accident caused your daughter's condition"...however, I could not get any of the doctors that evaluated her to commit to this...they would state what her condition /diagnosis was and also mentioned the accident in their documentation but they didn't link the two. I finally asked one of her doctors to address causation. She informed me that this was not a typical service she provided but did know a very reputable pediatric neurologist that provided this service. It was the main objective of his practice. However, he was located in South Bend. I didn't care if he was at the North Pole...I needed this..I needed to know.
A cardiologist saw Savannah for one visit for a heart murmur concern to which he determined was benign. During the visit I discussed with him the accident and how I had been on a quest to confirm my suspicions that the accident was the cause of her condition. He explained to me that typically if cerebral palsy is related to a genetic disorder it is metabolic in nature. He went on to say that if a genetic condition is diagnosed it is considered the primary diagnosis and the cause of developmental delay. He then said that cerebral palsy in these cases is a secondary diagnosis. Otherwise, if cerebral palsy is a primary diagnosis it is typically a result of an event that happened in utero, during birth , a premature birth, or the first five years of life. He said that the event causes decreased or lack of oxygen to the brain resulting in damage or death of brain tissue. He performed a test the day of Savannah’s office visit that could determine if her condition was due to metabolic factors or not. The test proved it was NOT metabolic in nature. Therefore, his feeling was that the accident was most likely the cause of her condition, but encouraged me to take Savannah to the pediatric neurologist as this would be a more specialized evaluation and would provide a more definitive diagnosis.
When I called the pediatric neurologist office I was asked if I had a lawyer. I told them I wanted to be sure this was linked before I made this step. I had a lawyer immediately after the accident but wasn't sure I was going to use him again.....even though I had been talking to him about the possibility of a claim for my daughter.....The doctor's office would not see her unless she A) had a lawyer's recommendation or B) a referral from a doctor.... I thought WOW he really does only see these type of patients...I called the doctor's office that recommended him...she immediately sent a referral...
The pediatric neurologist was the most intelligent medical professional I had talked to since the beginning of her medical journey. He ordered multiple tests and went through an extensive and very thorough history on Savannah and myself. After reviewing one hundred and eighty seven MRI images with me describing areas of the brain that had been damaged or did not develop at all, and explaining every wave form on several EEG studies, he was able to pinpoint her brain damage to her gestational age…..which happened to be at the time of the accident. He also stated “this little girl deserves some compensation, and you need a good lawyer”. He recommended a lawyer he was familiar with.
Thus began our long painful legal battle with the system. Not only the legal system, but the start of fighting legislation who set the laws currently out there that work AGAINST the American people. The same laws that prevent those of us that have or lives stripped away from us keeping us from reaching the American dream.
more to come about our battle with the system!!!! This part of the story will baffle all of you. It is unbelievable how America can let what happened to us happen at all to ANYONE. It is amazing and will leave you with your mouths on the floor and your heads shaking in disbelief. Because....until you live through it you will never understand it or even know that it is going on in the world!!!
WILL POST MORE ABOUT OUR LEGAL BATTLE WITH THE SYSTEM LATER THIS WILL INCLUDE THE MEDICAID SYSTEM THE AUTO INSURANCE SYSTEM THE LAWS THAT IMPEDE ABILITY TO GET THE PROPER HELP AFTER A CATASTROPHIC SITUATION, THE LAWS THAT DON'T ALLOW PROPER COVERAGE FOR COST OF LIVING FOR A FAMILY THE LAWS THAT PREVENT PEOPLE FROM REACHING THE AMERICAN DREAM AFTER EXPERIENCING A CATASTROPHIC SITUATION....ETC ETC ETC
